Some movies you clearly have to leave your brain at the door before seeing them.  There are things that are shown in these movies that are not humanly possible or probable for that matter.  The Bond franchise is a good example of this type of filmmaking.  The franchise more than makes up for it with a clever storylines, a strong male lead, beautiful women, exotic locales and memorable villains.  The Transporter series can be looked upon in the same way.  Fans have flocked to these movies mainly because of the ridiculous stunts and the charming Jason Statham.  “Transporter 3” will clearly test the patience of even the most ardent of supporters.

Jason Statham is back as Frank Martin.  Martin transports cargo, whether it be human or otherwise, for a fee.  He has certain rules that he follows.  He doesn’t look to what he is transporting, he doesn’t ask for any names and he always gets the job done.  He brags that he has a 100% success rate.  One would wonder if he would still be living if this wasn’t the case because of the people he deals with.  Why quibble with such things though?

Martin is relaxing in his home in Marseille when a car comes crashing through his living room.  In it was a friend of his and a mysterious young woman.  Martin soon learns that the friend was doing a job that Martin had turned down.  Martin had given the perspective employer his friend’s name to complete the mission.

Meanwhile, a real bad guy named Johnson (Robert Knepper) is blackmailing an Ukranian minister (Jeroen Krabbe) into allowing several ships with toxic material passage through a key waterway.  All he has to do is sign some papers to let this happen.  Johnson kidnaps his daughter Valentina (Natalya Rudakova) to accomplish this goal.  It is up to Martin to transport Valentina to a certain destination.  It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that Valentina is the cargo to begin with.  It takes Martin a little time, but he has other things on his mind.

A huge problem with this film is the Valentina character.  She must be the most annoying character in film this year.  Her English is perfect at times, but rudimentary at other times.  She says once with a straight face, “I want to feel the sex one more time before I die.”  I truly thought Borat was going to burst on to the screen and state that she is his sister.  Another annoying aspect to this character was when Martin was trying desperately to get away from some guys in another car.  They are traveling well over 100 miles an hour and she is crawling all over him and distracting him.  What sane person would do this while their life is in peril?

There are so many other problems with this film to count.  Why did they have to get Martin involved at all in this kidnapping?  It seems they could have just left her in a warehouse while these negotiations took place.  The other car that tried to ram Martin off the road was employed by the Ukranian minister to get his daughter.  Wouldn’t it defeat the purpose of extracting the daughter if she is killed while this is attempted?

The best part of the film is clearly Statham.  He has shown to be an effective action star in this series and in “The Bank Job” and “The Italian Job”.  He delivers his lines with aplomb. His martial arts and fighting skills are top notch.  Even though it never ceases to amaze me how many times the bad guys go at the hero one by one instead of all at once.  It happens not once but twice in this film.  It gets a bit tiring to see these old cliches turn up again and again.  After these numerous fights, it is good to know that Martin keeps a spare suit and a clean white shirt at the ready.

The Audi used in the film by Martin is another highlight.  This is one bad ass car.  It can survive severe drops into streams and getting launched on to a moving train.  The car is a key part of the plot because Johnson has placed bracelets on Martin and Valentina.  If either of them move 75 feet away from the car, the offending person explodes.  It seems that wouldn’t be handy if Valentina was the guilty party, since she is the only leverage the bad guys have.  Never mind.

“Transporter 3” is a brainless action flick that is only helped out by the work of Statham.  A much better choice would be the latest Bond film or rent “The Bank Job” for a much superior Statham offering.

Transporter 3 (2008)(Released date: 26 November 2008)   -   Rate & Review this!    -   Add to your LIST!  - Find similar releases! - Get Showtimes & Tickets on MovieJungle.com!